When your children are born you imagine that one day with your loving and nurturing care they will grow up to be Noble Prize winning authors, eminent surgeons, you know pillars of society types! Then gradually your ambitions for them start to disentegrate and you realise that all that really matters is that they grow up to be happy and in this one's case... we are doing our best to prevent him from spending some time at Her Majesty's Pleasure. Yes we have a two year old delinquent Chez Pirate.
Vandal? Check! Indeed, this one has a future career as a graffiti artist. Most significant crime? He walked up the hall with a purple crayon and left a line running the length of the hall and the very large, rather expensive painting hanging in the hall? Yes, went straight over the top of that too.
Thief? Check! Twice now we have found him harbouring stolen goods in his pram. He lunges for anything in reach and then hides whatever takes his fancy. We now have to search him and the pram before leaving any shops.
Identity theft? Check! He raided my purse and ran off with the drivers licence. Who knows what he was planning to use it for? When we finally found it, he had somehow snapped it in half. The mind boggles just thinking about it!
Here he is perfecting his break and enter techniques. Note the collection of tools at his feet:
Hmmmm.
Emma, you are just too funny. They are so lucky to have you as their mum with your brilliant sense of humour. J x
ReplyDeleteHmmm very sweet - love the picture and the collection of tools!
ReplyDeleteThank you for the birthday wish x
Oh my gosh - the painting - did you get the
ReplyDeletecrayon off? That's hilarious about the b&e!
The driver's license would have really upset me - I hate going to get those!
This is funny.
ReplyDeleteHaha... "We now have to search him and the pram before leaving any shops." - hilarioius. I can just picture you tapping down your son before you leave a store.
ReplyDeleteAh, he is a little monkey! No, sadly the painting now has a faint white stripe that runs the length of the painting, from where the crayon was removed. Hmmmm.
ReplyDeleteFar out Emma. You poor thing. There's never a dull moment is there. I can honestly say though, one day you'll sit back and laugh at all these crazy things that have happened. It's good you're writing them down... Pruxxx
ReplyDeleteWhat a cheeky boy! I'm sure you'll look back one day and remember these as the first signs of his initiative, determination and persistance - qualities that will take him far!
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